First, the back story. Several years ago, my friends, Jack and Jill (sorry about that) adopted two half sisters. They were older, and one had developmental issues. Not an easy case, but Jack and Jill did it. These two girls have come a long way, and I am thrilled to know them. I am sure that due to this, DCF approached Jack and Jill with another case. This one equally tragic.

The biological mother of two very young children had been arrested on criminal possession of narcotics, with the intent to distribute. For the record, in case DCF wants to know, I made some phone calls, and through public record, I have verified the the whole court case. DCF approached Jack and Jill and asked them to help, and hopefully adopt these two kids.  They expressed their concern that if they fostered these kids, and started the adoption process, that they could not bear the pain if these kids were to go back to the biological mother. See, Jack and Jill had been screwed by DCF before, and were very “cautious” about their dealings. Again, for the record, this to is documented, and is another case of DCF not putting the child’s best interest first. This one is equally unbelievable. But back to the issue at hand. They were told that this would not happen. Due to the biological mothers past history, and the charges, this was a “slam dunk”. So, Jack and Jill agreed to do this.

So, a few days later, 8 month old Ginny, and three and a half year Johnny arrived. Johnny was obviously very shy, and withdrawn. In his brief life, he had seen so many things, and all of them wrong.  Life is not easy for kids in this situation. Exposure to violence, narcotics, and poor nutrition are just a few of the issues. But over the past 18 months, I have watched these children absolutely flourish. Johnny was your typical little boy, adventurous, rambunctious, and just full of energy. This kid was doing back flips at four. Not somersaults, back flips. Ginny was growing up to be one of those toddlers who you couldn’t help but fall in love with. Needless to say, Jack and Jill  did.

Flash forward to August of 2009. The biological mother is being sentenced. Turns out, even slam dunks can be missed. No, she does not get off on a technicality. She pleads guilty to the charges, and is sentenced to six years in jail. Suspended. Three years probation with special conditions. I am sure the police were just as thrilled with this as Jack and Jill. Now the bull shit starts. Seems that DCF’s  primary focus is “reunification” and not the best interest of the child, despite the reality of the situation. Jack and jill are able to provide a safe and stable enviorment, where kids can thrive, and not have to worry about basic needs.  The biological mother? No job, no High School degree. A convicted felon. A history that started even before this incident. And DCF knew this. Yet, I guess, and I do not have a degree in any of this, that once a family is “reunited” then everything is suddenly alright. Happily ever after. Well, sorry, we all know otherwise.

Now, here is the part that really pisses me off. DCF deems that the mother can have custody of the kids, so long as she meets the MINIMUM standards. That’s right MINIMUM. Now, I absolutely agree that reunification is the best end result. But only after the parents have done EVERYTHING they need to do to show that they to are committed to becoming the parents they need to be. Counseling,treatment, training so that they can have a decent job. Education. Only then does reunification become the best option.

I do not know what the minimum standard is. Evidently it is you must have some sort of shelter, and be vertical for more than half the day. Was a GED required as both conditions for parole and custody of the kids. I would hope, as the mother was enrolled in a program to get one. Of course, when she found out that she was getting the kids back, she dropped out. Wonder if DCF and her parole officer know this? Was there inspections and follow up as to the environment that these kids would be going back to? Evidently, not as thorough as when DCF is checking on prospective foster and adoptive parents. Because if there were, then they would have found out that prior to the kids being dropped off for a two day visit, DCF would have opened the refrigerator door and found a dozen eggs, and a gallon of milk. I can go on about this, but I think I made my point.

Now comes the most horrific part of the story, one that I found out at about 10 PM last night. As many of you know, yesterday was the day that Johnny and Ginny had to be dropped off. That’s right dropped off. Seems that DCF doesn’t take into consideration that this weekend is MOTHER”S DAY, that the foster parents may have some feelings involved. That maybe, as heart wrenching as the whole situation is, that it maybe even more devastating to the foster/adoptive parents to see what the environment the innocent kids are being thrust back into. Actually, it was probably the best thing that they weren’t there in time. Turns out that if they had been on time, then the kids would have been there to have the house surrounded by the police while a person was being arrested on a warrant. Last I knew that is harboring a fugitive, and that is a parole violation. Maybe instead of trying to fix the situation, maybe the case worker involved should have stopped the insanity, and at the very least, should have delayed the transfer, pending review. But no, that did not happen. Now, I do see both sides of the story. The only reason that the police knew that this fugitive was there, was that a DCF worker in a different office called it in. And this gives me a glimmer of hope for DCF. I know a few people within the agency, and I know them to be good people. But they are fighting the system.

So today, it starts. Right now, Jack and Jill are out of state, trying to put some sense to this.  I have known about this for the past several months, but I had promised to let them try to resolve this through the proper  channels. Obviously, that did not work. But I have asked around, and this is not the only case. I will not go so far as to say that DCF is out of control, but obviously, there are issues. When I ask why no one says anything, words such as retribution are said. I hear that the ultimate goal is reunification . I say that this is wrong. The ultimate goal is the best interest of the child. That reunification is only the goal when this is the best thing for the child. When it comes to the safety of the child, then minimum is out the window, and the maximum effort should be shown to insure that the kids are going to a safe, and healthy environment.  I feel that the same standards and even more that are required for prospective foster/adoptive parents should be applied to biological parents before reunification is allowed. Let’s be brutally honest here. What are the chances that I can adopt a child if I was an unemployed, uneducated convicted felon, who has not shown any documentation that I have turned my life around?

What do I want? I want immediate action, as these kids are now in danger. I want the people who work for DCF, and truly care about the kids welfare to be able to do their jobs. I want the the best thing for these kids who have already been through so much to happen. I want a DCF that I can honestly say does the right thing for the children, all the time. I have heard of all the changes that are going to happen in the Capitol after these elections. I say why wait.

D

I am absolutely buried on the site redesign, and all the work that is required to make this site the best that I possibly can, so, I read what I can, when I can.  But there are two things that stick in my mind, and I constantly refer to them.  “Clarity of Thought“, and ” a Sense of Urgency“.  Very simple statements, but amazingly enough, we have to read them, before we understand their significance. Look at the world that surrounds us, think about these two statements, then ask yourself this. What if we as a society applied these on a regular basis?  Where would we be?

Now I am going to add back in the title, ” No Compromise Leadership” And put a primary emphasis on leadership. Let’s do a simple application here, because my target with this article can’t seem to do even simple arithmetic on this. Health Care. Funny how such a huge issue, can suddenly become a “lost cause“, a “tough sell“, another Washington fiasco.  Now the application.

“Clarity of Thought” How about can you really apply legislation to what amounts to a business problem without first determining what’s wrong with the system, who is responsible, determining how to bring all the players involved to the table, and what the fix should be?  How about how do we cut costs, hold the respective industries accountable, and make health care more affordable.  Availability was never a question. Affordability is.  I think that these are all reasonable thoughts, and furthermore, it would probably be more obvious, if the powers that be actually thought about this in a reasonable manner. One that did not involve polls, caucuses, and most importantly back room deals.

“Sense of Urgency” I’ll keep this one real brief. A family member gets sick. Doesn’t matter, it could be as simple as a case of strep going through a household. Now what if, the families insurance had a high copay, typically five grand. Now what if  the family had to pay 5 grand a year to have this insurance? Suddenly this family is paying 10 grand before a single cent is covered. Think this is unrealistic? Ask any small business owner, and this is a lot more common than one thinks. So on top being 10 grand short a year, this one case of strep may well cost six or seven hundred dollars due to doctors visits, medication, and possible lost wages. It’s called Medical bankruptcy, and the amount of them is staggering. Helping the middle class family avoid a situation like this seems pretty urgent, don’t you think?

“No Compromise Leadership” Yeah, I know, we are talking Washington DC, and at some point there has to be compromise. But not backroom deals, and pork barrel politics.  Here’s an easy bill to pass.  I will even write it. ” A person shall not be denied medical insurance due to pre -existing conditions”.  That’s it.  No compromise,  no bullshit, no reason that can’t be passed.  The option for a person to change to a lower cost policy does not exist because of this.

So, in closing, as soon as I am done with my copy, I am sending it to DC. Anyone want to donate a few hundred copies? I will even hand deliver them.

Clearly, responsibly managing one’s money in this tough environment is essential. Below are some simple resolutions we can make to reduce our money challenges:

1. BUILD CREDIT SCORE

The biggest factor in one’s credit score is prompt bill payment. Therefore, paying one’s bills on time is essential. Also, paying off outstanding debt helps raise your score, as well.

2. MANAGE SPENDING

Manage spending by finding less expensive alternatives to even basic items, such as groceries, insurance, entertainment and gifts. One might be surprised at the level of savings, by simply comparing a few prices. And, searching for bargains can be both rewarding and fun.

3. BUDGET

Make a budget plan and stick to it. While making your plan, budget for unexpected expenses, too. We all know that we have them, so set aside some extra money for things like that unfortunate flat tire. Create a gift budget, too. It’s easy to be sidetracked by gift expenses. We don’t want to appear cheap, and so we spend more than we can. Remember, real friends are happy to have you in their lives and are not measuring you by the dollar expenditure of your present.

4. BOOST SAVINGS

If your employer offers a match to its 401K plan, make sure that you contribute at least to the company’s match. Otherwise, you are throwing away free money! Also, try to contribute the maximum to your retirement plan. Lastly, simply saving your change at the end of the day could add many dollars to your monthly budget. Those nickels could help your grocery bills.

5. REVIEW YOUR INVESTMENTS

Just as corporations come out with quarterly earnings reports, take stock of your household’s financial health once a quarter, too. That way, you insure that you are staying on track towards your financial goals.

6. CONSIDER TAX CONSEQUENCES OF ANY MONEY DECISION

Remember there are tax consequences to financial decisions such as short sales or withdrawals from retirement accounts. Be sure to check with your tax advisor.

By making a few Resolutions, you can be on the road to Financial Health in the New Year!

Here at Shoreline Out and About, we do what we can to avoid specific politics, and will neither support nor attack political issues or candidates. We will express our opinions though, and are working  on a few things to give you fair and balanced opinions. To borrow a page from Mr. O’ Brien’s post, consider it to be The Shoreline Out and About Center of Fair and Intelligent Opinions  Telling Both Sides Of The Story.  Or something like that.

So, to get things started, I thought that this weeks Massachusetts Senate campaign is hopefully a sign of things to come. And it has nothing to do with Republican vs. Democrat. I am hoping that this is the election that history cites as the time when Americans took back their government. An election where the deciding votes did not come from the left or the right side of the aisle, but from the center. In many towns, cities, and states, the amount of people who are registered Independents is growing.  Many of us are tired of having to be associated with a specific party. Myself, I was a lifelong Republican. Did the Ronnie thing, liked Bush Sr, and thought that Dole was pretty cool in his own sort of way. Okay that was a stretch, but you get my drift here.

So, what happened?  Was it W?  Nope. Started happening before that.  I did my time in the Marines, raised the family. Tried to survive in this economy. What changed is that I learned to think on my own. I felt that the Moral Majority, and the Christian Conservatives did not reflect my views, so why were they so prominent in my parties politics. I learned that we as a society need to help those who truly need it, and not dump everyone who needs help into the “lazy, and not willing to work” file. I realized that we need to have a strong defense, and yes, we do have to be the world’s police force, because no one else can, and the UN is totally ineffective. That’s just a start, but, again, you get my drift.

Now, back to the Massachusetts thing. Is it the fact that Scott Brown, Republican State Senator took “The Kennedy seat” the issue at hand? No. And I like how the new Senator phrased it. “With all due respect, it’s not the Kennedy’s seat, and it’s not the Democrat’s seat, it’s the people’s seat” And that’s my point. The people elect the Mayors, and Congressman and Senators. Governors and Presidents, you work for us. The fact that in MASSACHUSETTS where the Democrats hold the majority of the seats across  the board, a little known Republican State Senator wins the Senate seat, that shows us something. In this state, known for being a Democratic  state, the largest political party,  is the Independent Party.  We don’t have a national, state or even local headquarters. We do our own thing. We vote because we care, and we think on our own. So why the choice of the Gadsden Flag? Other than the fact it was the flag carried by the first five companies of Continental Marines, it is a symbol of what we need to do. And that is let Washington D.C. Hartford and all the other centers of government know that we are paying attention, and that we are voting. That we are sick of business as usual. That it is time to leave the BS of politics past behind, and get our collective asses in gear, and moving forward.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/01/10/facebooks-zuckerberg-the_n_417969.html

Now, after having watched this, here’s a few thoughts.

First, if you use the internet, then in many ways, you have established an internet presence, and therefore, some way for the search engines, spammers, whomever is looking for you, the ability to find you.  Period, end of discussion.  That’s a given.  So what’s the problem?  In a nutshell, here it is.  My problem with Mr. Zuckerberg, is that he presumes a little much, and assumes even more.  The majority of Facebook users do not understand how big a business the internet is.  They do not know the value that is placed on personal information.  To assume that we all get it, is a mistake. To presume that because people put their information on Facebook, they know that the information is now being sold, and accessed by many different types of businesses is a shame.

Now, even if people realize this is happening, and are okay with it, what type of information is being sold?  Names,  High School attended,  phone number, date of birth? Or is it more?  Try finding out, it’s not easily found on Facebook.  It should be readily available, and fully disclosed.  Just to make your life easier, if you are on your Facebook home page, click on “setting”, then “privacy” then “search”. Now here is where you should see what is given to anyone who buys the info, and what you should do to prevent that, as it is still YOUR information. In actuality, this is what you see.

The reason this came up, was I read a story in “The Shoreline Times” by Jerome Wilson. This was a “special” to the paper, which to me was not all that special, and was about The Katharine Hepburn Cultural Arts Center, and the center finding it’s “niche”.  If I did not know the story behind the monumental effort to get this center going, the commitment of all involved, I would be screaming for change. If I did not see with my own eyes the support at the open houses on both Memorial Day, and during the Labor Day weekend, I would question, was it all worth it? But here’s the catch. I have seen the effort, I have seen the public support. I have seen what it takes to start a project and the effort it takes to make that project grow. I don’t care what you heard in “Field of Dreams”.  Even if you build it, it takes a little time for them to come. Time, and a lot of hard work.

Now in this article, it is made to sound like, with few exceptions, that pretty much everything tanks at ” The Kate”, and virtually no one goes.  Please, let’s be a little more fair. Let’s be a little more balanced. Yes, some shows have in fact tanked. No doubt about it. Some shows have sold out, such as  “ Die Fiedermaus” and the other simulcasts have been overwhelming successes.

Here’s another show that Mr. Wilson left out, and a real shame too, as it really captures what having  “The Kate” in Old Saybrook  really means. During that “dismal” month of December, a truly special event occurred. The Small Town Concert Series, led by Matthew Male, and Lauren Agnelli, in conjunction with The Shoreline Acoustic Underground held a fundraiser for the Shoreline Soup Kitchen and Pantry. This was sponsored by Acousticmusic.org, and raised $6,788.00 for a truly worthy cause, including a donation from The Madison Rotary Club. Now tickets were $20, and Cd’s were $10, so do the math. This was pretty amazing, but then when you factor in a matching donation from The Gowrie Group, the total was $13,576.00. Great job by all, and it would not have happened with out “The Kate”.

I will point out that Mr. Wilson does acknowledge the success of two other performances. That of the “Cappella Cantorum” and the play “Wild Blue Yonder” by local playwright Lary Bloom. And here in lies the key. It’s about “finding the niche” as Mr. Wilson points out. It’s about being positive, and emphasizing the positive. Maybe the key to the success of “The Kate” lies in a mix of bringing The Met’s simulcasts, shows such as Toto and The Pure Prairie League, local artists such as Small Town Concert Series to “The Kate“. Next week, The Shiny Lapel Trio and Ryan Hartt and the Blue Hearts will be tearing it up, and The Small Town Concert Series will be back with “Wine, Women and Song“. I would be surprised if these shows do not sell out.

Starting a new enterprise in times like these is not easy. We work our tails off to get exposure, to get the word out there. We all fight for an ever shrinking cash pool. Maybe, just maybe, there are other factors for some shows having poor attendance. But maybe, we should take some time, let “The Kate” grow into the name, and find what works. “The Kate” is not just a business that will be judged by it’s gross income and bottom line. “The Kate” is a symbol. It is about having a centerpiece to rebuild our community, to encourage people to get out and socialize, and become that community again.  It is about giving all the talented local musicians,playwrights, and artists a venue to show all that they have to offer. It is a magnificent building, idea, and concept. A treasure. One that many towns would love to have.

I don’t have to remind anyone about the economic crisis that we are in. I know that times are tough. But what I do know is that we, as a society, need to realize that times like these is a reason to give something, and not as an excuse to not give anything. So, let’s look at it this way. There are 307 million Americans. Let’s say 25% of that are the people we are trying to help, or those who physically can’t help/donate/volunteer. That leaves over 230 million Americans. Just a staggering number. Now what if each one of these Americans donated a pint of blood, a can of food, ten dollars, or an hour of their time. Everyone of us can do that. here’s what that breaks down to, if it was evenly divided

57 and a half MILLION pints of blood

57 and a half MILLION volunteer hours

575 Million dollars

Over 43 MILLION pounds of food.

That’s per month. And that is something that 75% of the American population can do, but for the most part, it doesn’t happen. That is why I am writing this. I can’t change the world, or this country. But what I can do is help my friends and neighbors. I can help someone I don’t even know on the shoreline. I can try to make this a better place for all of us. One article at a time, one fundraiser at a time, one hour at a time. It does make a difference.

So, if you know a charity that needs help, have them contact me. If you want to know where you can find more info on helping, contact me. If you know someone who needs help, but does not know where to start, contact me. Check our events calender, as I will be posting as many events there as possible. Let’s show every other region, and state that by acting as a community, by doing one little thing, but as that community, we all can make a difference.

We aim above the mark to hit the mark. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Every year, Dow Jones compiles a list of the prior year’s gobbledygook, a compendium of words and phrases that have been overused to the extent that they’ve been rendered meaningless. The winner for 2008 was innovative, which comes as no surprise, given our propensity to persist in the belief that we remain innovative, even as we surrender more and more to deleterious governmental paternalism and economic collectivism that saps our senses of initiative, even as it steals our resources and eliminates our incentives to innovate. Because there is so little room or reward for innovation, then, innovative has become like honest: the less one is either, the more likely one is to trumpet being both.

In the parlance of informal logic, using a descriptive word or phrase that seems to reaffirm what we wish to prove – that suggests a point at issue has been settled when, in fact, it remains in question – is called the fallacy of the question-begging epithet. The employment of that fallacy is a favorite tactic of marketing firms, advertising agencies, public relations flacks, and technology companies. It’s especially favored by government officials and agencies, desirous as they are to have us believe something vital is going on while they’re sucking the vitality out of whatever it is they’re touting. It’s their way of making us feel richer while they’re robbing us blind. (See Obama, President.)

An indication of what we’ve lost, what we’re losing, and why we’ll continue to lose it is provided in an article published last summer in History Today, written by Andre Balogh, Emeritus Professor of Space Physics at Imperial College, London – and Director of the International Space Science Institute in Bern, Switzerland. In the article, “Above and Beyond: The Apollo Space Race to the Moon“, Mr Balogh didn’t overtly state that he misses the innovative spirit that characterized the United States just 40 years ago. But one discerns a kind of longing for what’s been lost now that we’ve opted to forgo taking chances in favor of being taken care of. (See Obama, President.)

Apollo was … symbolic of a different mentality, optimistic, can-do, and willing to confront the most awe-inspiring challenges … the United States, once moved, could do what nobody else could do [because it] recognized that the most important and convincing force in international politics is the perception of superiority … And so the vast technical might of the United States was put into gear to design, test, and carry out the project … [but today] a manned mission to Mars seems beyond the reach of affordable technology and political will [because of] the vast increase in the thresholds of risk that are now seen as acceptable … Apollo could not be reproduced in the 21st century, simply because … sights have lowered as fears have increased.

There is some consolation here, though. Yes. We have become fearful of things like aeronautics, exploration, adventure, and invention. We have killed innovation in favor of complacent timidity and compliant obedience. We have abdicated all manner of independence because dependence is … well … easier, isn’t it? After all, taking it easy is what people are supposed to do when Big Daddy is teaching them how to be safe, right? And we’re good boys and girls.

But Mr. Balogh is wrong about one thing: we’ve completely overcome our fear of big numbers, especially when they’re used to describe monetary concepts. He suggests we no longer have the national appetite for the $20 billion to $25 billion we spent on the Apollo program, let alone the equivalent of $150 billion in today’s dollars. What does he know? We’re staring straight down the barrel of $1.8 trillion, and we’re not even blinking. Why should we? Big Daddy says it’s what we have to do. So, it must be okay. (See Obama, President. If you’re inclined to say that report is “biased” because Fox News is “conservative”, you’re not likely to say The New York Times is “liberal”. But you can find exactly the same information there; although, you might have to register to get it. Gee, I wonder why it’s harder to get the information there?)

Next year, the Dow Jones list of gobbledygook will contain a bunch of other terms that have lost their meaning this year. Look for old favorites like motivation, democracy, liberty, national defense, capitalism, competition, entrepreneuralism, self-sufficiency – you know, things we just won’t need anymore, now that we’re a nation of kept, obsequious, and highly useful idiots. Equality will be big. But equal opportunity should be a goner by next year, too.

It’s okay. They’re only words. Attaching undue importance to them misses the mark.

Like so many other folks, I am unemployed. More precisely, I am partially employed, working part-time at two radio stations and picking up occasional voice-over jobs all of which I am grateful for but all of which combined will not pay my mortgage let alone my electric bill.

And, like so many other folks, I am only partially employed because of a horrendous economy, not because of anything I did to get myself fired. I was laid off from a place I went to for nearly 20 years. A place that was part of my DNA and a place that, in many ways, came to define who I was.

All of which is why, when I was suddenly and unceremoniously laid off in April, I felt as if my world had been pulled out from under me. See, my job was not just a job, it was my career; something I had built over the years, succeeded at and was extremely proud of. I loved my job. I always told people I had the best job in the world and I meant it.

My Mom and Dad always told me that if I worked hard and was a good person I’d be successful. Losing one’s job while doing all the right things at that job wasn’t something I understood. I was number one at what I did yet my job was taken away from me…I was eliminated from the place where I had loyally served for so many years. They decided they could do without me. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.

On April 17, 2009, my “husband” of nearly 20 years told me he didn’t love me anymore and he wanted me to go away. Just like that. I was in love with “him” and I thought we had such a happy marriage! I cooked, I cleaned, I took care of the kids, and I made passionate love to “him” at least 5 times a week, never straying, but somehow it wasn’t enough and suddenly, after nearly 20 years of being in that happy marriage, I found myself forced to start dating again.

I didn’t want to date and I didn’t have any idea how to date.

But my “husband” didn’t care and although I hoped “he” would reconsider and take me back it that still hasn’t happened.

If you are lucky enough not to have ever experienced being laid off, you won’t know about the strange things that go along with such a life-changing turn of events. As if it’s not earth-shattering and ego-blowing enough to lose your job – through no fault of your own – when you suffer the misfortune of being laid off people who you thought were your friends are suddenly nowhere to be found. Apparently, this species is afraid of catching the “lay off disease” from you even though it’s really not contagious. Really. If you get laid off, be prepared for this very odd and disturbing phenomenon. You may never hear from some of your former co-workers who you considered friends. It hurts. A lot. But the upside will be the NEW friends you will make. People you never really knew before will reach out to you offering ideas and their friendship.

But be aware that to find your new circle of friends you do need to get yourself out there; they aren’t simply going to manifest in your living room while you sit on your couch in sweatpants eating a bowl of ramen noodles. Of course it is tempting to hide under the covers and feel miserable but, personally, I am too much of a worrier to have allowed myself such an indulgence…I HAVE to work for a living and sitting in a corner rocking back and forth certainly isn’t going to help me find employment. I’ve heard it’s not a “skill set” (an expression that I despise) that looks good on your resume.

If you get laid off be prepared to hear this expression repeatedly from people who really do mean well: “when one door closes, another one opens”. You’ll hear it. A lot. And the other ever-popular phrase: “things happen for a reason “.

Okay well it’s been six months for me and I am still waiting for the reason to reveal itself and for the next door to open. Is there a statute of limitations on these phrases?

People have actually told me I need to “move on” and those are always people who are employed; people who have no idea what it is like to have your career derailed, your life turned upside down and your future uncertain…when you did nothing wrong. Move on to what? Of course these people have not been thrown out into an economy that is teetering on the edge of a 10% rate of unemployment. I may need to move on but they need to pay attention because they might very well be next. Oh and a little compassion for my situation would also be appreciated.

There is one thing of which I am fairly certain: when I get my next full-time job, whatever it may be, (hey are you hiring??) it will make the scars of being laid off heal a whole lot more quickly. Because six months after my “husband” disavowed me, I am still riding that rollercoaster of emotions that being laid off presents: some days I am angry, some days I am sad; other days I feel scared and lost and always I am still wondering why this had to happen.

Just please don’t tell me it happened for a reason.

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